When my friends and family come to me to discuss something, I have to ask them, “Do you want me to be your friend or your coach right now?” It looks very different.
If you come to me and say Suzie said this horrible thing to me, as a friend I’m like, “Oh no she didn’t”, and we hate her.
If I’m your coach, I say she can’t make you feel any certain way, it’s only your thoughts about what she said that are causing you these feelings.
Very different hats.
I have found that coaching friends or especially my husband without permission just really pisses them off.
But my friends do sometimes hire me as a coach to help them lose weight. I am actually starting with a few this week. This blog is a warning for them.
Most people think that they don’t want to be coached. Why? I think they like their story and they actually want to feel those feelings, and that is absolutely okay. I also sometimes need my friends to completely wallow with me in my sad made-up stories.
Also, sometimes my job as a friend is to give you comfort.
My job as a coach is to make you uncomfortable.
If you’re not uncomfortable you’re not growing or changing. Weight loss requires you to be uncomfortable. Our brain wants our life to stay the same and does not want to fail. We need to expect the uncomfortable feelings and not let them stop us from our goals.
Yay, bring on the discomfort!
